What love is this?

Hello friends!! We've got some catching up to do! Now sit down and grab your grande Salted Caramel Mocha and let's chit chat. My last entry was in June (I know so much has happened!!) so let me do a fast and furious run through!!
You know God just amazes me again and again! In Romans 8, it says "I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God's love."  Well I'm going to SHOUT out a huge AMEN to that!!!!
In July, with only a matter of days until the event, we really had our work cut out for us. Our precious homegroup gave up consecutive Saturdays to help us cut ribbons, make labels, wrap coffee cans, organize baskets, brainstorm, plan, and gather the most amazing prizes for the event. God works mighty in His people and loves deeply! I would send texts almost daily to these girls and one of the replys that just melted my heart was this..."Dear Baby Jeter, I was one of the ladies with your mama today. We had a great time, ate great food, and laughed alot too! Please know you are loved! We don't even know your name yet. You are a part of our families and we don't even know what you look like. You will be in our prayers today, tomorrow, and always. You are precious to all of us!" LOVE LOVE LOVE these families!!!!!!!
On the morning of August 5th, I don't think Michael and I knew what all would happen that day. Early that morning our dear friends Carrie and Andrea met us at the house to help load the numerous donations. It took 3 SUV's people!! Yeehaw! A few last minute changes caused a little tears and panic, but it was all a-okay. At 11:00 we bombarded Fat Daddy's to start the set up! Let me tell you how to get things accomplished...call your besties and give them a vision! They will move mountains I tell ya!! It truly was Christ's community in Action!!! Our homegroup took the lead with humble grace they formulated a set up that ROCKED everyone's socks off!!! Thank you to Billy and Kristy Chadwell, Mike and Dana Glass, Wes and Tammy Harkrider, Andy and Amy Marcontell, Robert and Amy Wood who served from morning till 11:00pm that night!!!!!!  At 12:00, our amazing vendors started rolling in. Thanks again for bringing excitement and shopping to this event! By 3:00 our friends started coming in droves!! We were so blessed!! Our homegroup started the event in prayer asking that everything we do be to the glory of God! His grace and love was ever present!!!! Our performers were all amazing and thanks again to Chris Sommer from KRLD radio for being our emcee!!! I think the part that made us just cry and cry was when Philip Braun started the live auction and total strangers, who didn't even know us, started donating items and services!!! Absolutely amazing! We were so touched by everyone's presence from our own families that drove in from Abilene and East Texas, dear high school friends that gave their entire afternoon to love on us, my former first graders and their families, sweet coworkers, our church family, and the community! WE ARE GRATEFUL!! The event raised over $26K for Christian Homes and Family Services!!

I'm going to quote a friend who recently adopted their sweet angel and was so filled with gratitude for the love and support they received...
 "You did it simply because love was your highest goal.  Love for a child you've never met. Love for our family, whom some of you have met, and some of you haven't. But even greater than that... Love for a Savior, who said YOU MATTER TO ME. And now all you can do in return is pass on that love to others."

So what now??? Well we have been very blessed to raise all the necessary funds. We had our homestudy on August 17. We love our caseworker Amy! Her work at Christian Homes is such a blessing to so many!!! Our homestudy wasn't as painful as we thought it was going to be. Hee hee! You know you want to be "normal" or whatever that is! It's hard to be transparent and authentic in sharing your lifestory and home with someone for the first time, but Amy made us feel comfortable and relaxed. Hee hee! It's been 8 weeks since our study and we are "officially" in the waiting period. All the forms have been completed, requirements met, financial obligations provided. So now we wait. The timeline from here on out can vary greatly from just a few weeks, few months, to 18 months on average, or more it all depends on a lot of things. So were praying for God to reveal His plan and perfect timing. In our waiting time, we've been reminded how much God loves us. We both recently served a Tres Dias weekend. I know God uses these weekends to pour out His love on others. There's just something about stopping all phone calls, TV, Facebook, texts, emails, and blogs when you can quietly reflect. I received a special blessing in one word, (random sidebar...every person had a different word given to them that weekend) as kind of a love note from God. Well mine said "Companion" which means "a person with whom one spends a lot of time with" and Michael received "Spoken for" which means "promised or intended". Initially I was confused by my word, because I just didn't understand it. After talking with Michael, he helped me see how God is my one true comfort and companion. God has promised us and loves spending time persuing, seeking, and demonstrating His love for His people.

A few dear friends have asked us if we've heard anything or where were at in the process? Here it is in a nutshell, we're waiting. What all does one do while waiting, hoping, and dreaming... a little shopping. Just a little, nothing too out of control. Now naturally I am a gifted shopper, so I love to find cute things and bargains! I did happen to stumble across the cutest baby bedding ever! Thank you Mitzi, owner of The Pink Frog Boutique! Y'all check her out on Facebook! Darling Darling Darling! So we went ahead and ordered a neutral baby bedding set. Ms. Dee and Boppie Clary are going to come and help us design a nursery. Piddle party at the Jeters!! All are invited!!! Yahoo! We're just so excited!

I didn't know how busy I would be this September/October with school starting back up and a few Saturday meetings for our ladies retreat, but time management is coming back into play. I constantly need a lot of help with that! LOL!  I have A.D.O.S (Attention Deficit Oooh Shiny!!) quite frequently!! All that to say is this blog may be a hit or miss, but I promise, PROMISE to SHOUT it from the mountain tops when we have an update. I jokingly said "I'll most likely buy a radio slot to announce our good news!" Thanks for reading! I bet your coffee needs to be reheated!

Here's the link to the smilebox video I made of the event! Be sure to watch it all the way through the two songs! Hee hee! Adoption Event  Just this last week I wrote the last of the 215 thank you cards! I'm headed to the post office today! Hee hee! Now that's a good problem to have, over 215 people and businesses to thank!!!  I sure hope we didn't leave anyone out, but if I did, please know that we are grateful. Much love for yall!
Lareta and Michael

Anything

Let's Rewind...April 13-14 was our Adoption Orientation weekend in Abilene. After our orientation weekend we knew we had some work to do to complete paperwork, schedule home visits, and raise funds. So we completed all of our paperwork (YAHOO!!) and called to make the home visits. After talking with our case worker she encouraged us to have all of our funds prepared prior to approval so that if a birthmom selected us we would be able to proceed. So Michael and I made a plan to wait until after our August event to see where we are at financially. We've said we don't want to be in debt and if this is what God wants then it will be provided through this event and months of saving. Everything in me says HURRY get me to my baby, so alas I yield to Michael's Godly wisdom and months of Dave Ramsey!!! LOL! I've talked about this before... But how does one truly prepare for a financial hurdle like nothing else you've ever encountered? How does one compose what seems to be the most emotional letter of a lifetime to a birthmom? What pictures are the ones that a birthmom will look at in our scrapbook and want to choose us? Author, Jennie Allen says "Doubt is in all of us...if we go there. If we let it rush in every once in a while." Well let's just say the "doubt" WAS WINNING!!! Man it's ugly, snarly, little self began to spin around in my mind. Doubt imprisoned me. Doubt made me think, perhaps this isn't the path we are meant to travel. Mother's Day came at church and I was emotionally spent. I couldn't bear to go, so I stayed home. Then another week passed and my heart was aching a little more. I was starting to take a piece of my heart away from God. Then one more week passed and my doubt had fully seized me. Three weeks away from our wonderful family at Stonegate and we were in need of  HELP!!! We met with our small group at church and begged for prayers. YES, BEGGED. Flat out, cried out asking God to send some confirmations, something that this was still our path, something from God that would say THIS IS MY WILL DO IT!!!!! Again, cue the doubt. I can't even get to the other side of becoming an adoptive mom, because I've been frozen staring at fees and wallowing in doubt. My bestie Holly said "Lareta, how are you emotionally? I mean really how are you feeling about this adoption?" My heart sank, as tears streamed down my face. Well my reply "Honestly, it feels so far away. I don't even know how to imagine that it can happen. I'm scared one minute, I'm happy the next. I'm certain, I'm uncertain. I'm a hot mess!!" So in my doubt, I was belittling the significance of God and not turning my short page of life over to Him. I don't know if you'll be able to relate to this at all. It's just something I'm talking through with God and you happen to be reading it. I love Him! I beg for Him to see through my shame, my fears, my doubt, my will, and DO only what He knows is His will. Y'all I'm vulnerable in sharing, but I hope you hear my heart.
Fast forward two weeks into summertime, I received a text from Kristy (darling friend in our church home group) that says "I want to host a garage sale for your adoption." Thank you God! Thank you for being visible! Now here we are two weeks later, listening to people saying "Sure,we can help!" "Absolutely, we will put it on our calendars" "Of course, count us in!" "We are praying for yall!" So the month of June has been a steady march to different businesses asking for donations, praying with friends, numerous emails, countless phone calls, days of non stop, days of I can't bear to hear another "No sorry, not at this time." All to raise funds for this prayer. 

At the end of May, one of my dear friends invited me to participate in a summer book study called "Anything" by Jennie Allen. Now, I love my darling Andrea and anytime I can spend with those sweet girls at her house is pure delight for the soul! Embarking on this book, it questions "Who is God to you?" and basically how does "everything in this world keep us from anything". The "anything" that only God knows. You may ask "I wonder what my 'anything' is?" I'm 2 weeks into this book study and Jennie poses this question, "What are you most afraid of? What would be the very worst thing that God may allow you to suffer?" That got me to thinking. What am I most afraid of? I might say snakes, spiders, but I could look within myself to a deeper level and all my WHAT IF scenarios... What if I never have a biological child? What if I lose my loving husband? What if I lose every single posession I own or my health? What IF we never get chosen to be adoptive parents? BLAH BLAH BLAH.

Am I going to push away God or allow Him to have all of me? So let's fast forward to last Sunday at bible study. You know God just wanted to talk to me and tell me, he wants ALL OF ME FOR HIS ANYTHING. He doesn't want to compete anymore. HE wants all of me. A song was shared, it's by Matt Hammitt, called "Let Go". So that's where I'm at emotionally. I'm letting go. As always He's continually persuing me, even in my doubt. Once I said "God I can't do this. I can't go this alone. I don't know how it will come together, but you do. I will trust in you." All my phone calls weren't suddenly "yes's" but I felt a peace that God would lead me to the people who would say "yes". The outpouring of help and support has been overwhelming. I can't even begin to tell you how REAL God is and how He is for adoption!!!! Oh and just so ya know our garage sale raised $600!! 

Check out all the help and donations for our event, here goes the shout outs:

Hayley Chadwell for busting her tushy at one of the hottest days of summer garage sale, people of Midlothian who wrote us letters of encouragement on the day of the garage sale, our home group for helping us put together an amazing event, Betsy who listens to my ramblings of how does one plan an event, Charla Corn and her band, Michael Padgett and Derek for performing, Matt Edwards for being my MC, Fat Daddy's for letting us use their AMAZING facility, Chelsea who is my go to girl for ANY question, OMG Adorable for the cutest little tote bags and hats, The Bling Lady, Scentsy items and Gold Canyon from Amanda Farina and Donna Ryan, Bows and More from Cute Stuff Boutique, Section 37 Rangers Tickets from Carrie, Stitches by Sherri items, Antique clocks and adorable knitted items from Jean, Hunting Trip from the Glasses, Handmade Quilt made by Texas Grandma, Mary Kay Basket from Grannybear, Salon Basket from Salon at Vaught House, 4Day weekend tickets from Josh, Cupcakes from Carol's Cupcakery, Cakes from Cooper Street, Cake Pops from Sugar Pop Wishes, Photo Session and bridal pkg from Enchanted Photography, Custom Painting by Rose, Autographed Martina McBride Photo from MARTINA!!!!, Gift Certificate from Happy Nail, 4 ct. Ruby Sapphire Necklace from Anne, $200 gift certificates from Firestone Store, $200 in training sessions from CrossFit Fervor, Free Appetizer cards from Cotton Patch, Wine Baskets from Winestyles, Tickets from Arlington Theatre, and Rangers 3rd row seats behind home plate from Oil States Industries and all of you who are taking the time to read this blog!!! Thank you for your prayers!!!

PEOPLE this list just keeps growing!!!!!! Unbelievable!!! I give GOD all the glory and all of me. Give God ALL of you... He just might call you to something amazing!  See you on August 5th between 2-7, get there before 7pm though so you can be a part of winning prizes!!!! Here's the song http://youtu.be/GhmbtZfVi9U

It only gets better!!

Last Thursday, I embarked on a girl's trip to attend a 3 day ladies retreat in Navasota, Texas. Our darling friends from church had invited us to attend a Tres Dias weekend. Michael and I began to pray about this and felt like it was something we should experience. Michael went first a few weeks back with some guys from church and if you read my last entry, you KNOW how much I missed him!! So much that I thought my heart was going to burst, but what I didn't communicate was how he came home a changed man. His love for God and for me was renewed. I got to experience firsthand, a serving heart and grace in action. Thank you to all who were involved in this weekend! May you be blessed abundantly.

Well last weekend it was my turn to go with the ladies. The week leading up to it, I came down with the flu, strep, an ear infection, and serious loss of mobility in my neck! (Now the neck thing was funny, we did laugh at me being basically frozen in one direction!)  I seriously thought I would not be able to attend. I mean really, WHO gets all that mess at the SAME TIME?!?!! Fortunately, "God is still in the healing business." He helped me get well in time to go. So the first night, we arrived at camp. We had to check in at the gate and I gave a fake name "Hello my name is Tyritha Jenkins" after a few minutes, the car BURST into laughter!! Thank you Kristy for an excellent practical joke and thank you Lesli for letting us come into the campgrounds!! Hee hee! It was a great ice breaker!  We were whisked away to our cabins and then finally congregated again all standing around. Of course I went into giggle mode! I had the nervousness like when I left for college. Most days I'm a confident woman, but if you take me out of my first grade classroom or my living room, I'm not always this confident creature. Tammy, Kristy, and I giggled and anxiously awaited what was to come. We entered into a large conference room and sat down. One by one we introduced ourselves and became fast friends. My confidence grew as I became more familiar with the people who were surrounding me for the next 3 days. Now I have a bit of control issues. I must confess that I do not bode well with not knowing what our objectives will be and not knowing what will happen next. So God decided to have a little fun with that!!

For the next 72 hours he touched my heart and captured my full attention. We had 15 small talks/outbreak sessions, where we discussed different topics all focused on building a relationship with Christ. I was feeling great. I really was feeling good. The laughter was flowing, the songs were uplifting, and I was doing just "peachy". That was until, God reached right into my chest and grabbed my heart to see if I really accepted HIS GRACE. A condition of receiving His grace is full acceptance. The precious speaker spoke of God's healing grace and how He's still into the healing business, that's when I got angry.  It's true, I got downright into a tizzy!!! I asked God why hadn't I been healed? As tears streamed down my face Jesus gently reminded me how He overcame. He still loves me and He may not have removed my infertility, but He's healed my broken, worrisome heart, and reminded me that I was worthy of His grace. Yes! I am beautiful and worthy of His grace. In this crazy world of rush, rush, rush. God took 72 hours to remind this silly, sinful girl that I'm still His. To think that 2,000 years ago He set this incredible plan in motion. He knew I would fail again and again. He knew I would be selfish, prideful, and lost in this world without Him. After experiencing this weekend, I'm praying that I will allow God to use me for His service. I want to show His love and grace. I think everyone deserves a chance of renewal with God. I'm so thankful He keeps pursuing me!!!

God keeps going to great lengths to pursue me!

Following last weekend, we got another call about a possible adoption. Sweet Baby Kate needs our prayers. The darling guardians of this child want to remain an active part in her life and felt that we lived too far away for this to occur. I know God will answer this prayer. I will say it again, we're so grateful for the support of friends, family, and total strangers who've joined us in this journey. We are humbled by the love, acts of service, and generosity that's been poured out over us. We were going to end the shirts sells, but the requests just keep coming, so the link is back up and running! I currently have about 3-5 of every single size in stock, youth through adult. If by chance, I don't have your size, the printing process only takes about 2 weeks. You can expect it to arrive shortly.

Our Tres Dias weekend had a theme, it was from Jeremiah 29:11-13.  I've loved this verse since my college roommate plastered it across our bathroom mirror! (Love you Kristen, K-10!!) I see it fitting to end this entry with this scripture.  From the NLT version, "For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me." 

I pray that you seek Him, Know Him, and Trust Him wholeheartedly! Love you all! Lareta

My darling co-workers

Sweetie pie Laura



Cuteness in a nutshell Clarkie



My other sister Amy and sweet Taylor!

Because of 3 days...

Updates...we are still taking shirt orders online through 3/23/12. If you already placed your order, I promise they will arrive in just a few more days. Sherri is quickly screening away. (We just had our image digitized so that we could start the whole printing process.) I'm so excited!!!!! Hee hee!

June 19, 1999 Our wedding kiss!! Hubba Hubba! Hee hee!

Last weekend my hubby went to a men's retreat called Tres Dias. Throughout the weekend the men grew closer and helped each other grow in their faith in Jesus. So while my darling hubby was gone, I was left to my own devices...cue the chocolate, shopping, sappy movies, card playing and giggling with the girls. OKAY don't laugh, but I lied awake with my eyes open like an hoot owl!!! HA!! My goodness did I ever miss him and try to "fill" my time with things and activities. I don't think I knew how much I would miss him, until he was gone for 3 days!!!!! Now that he's back it's been one amazing week!!! My girlfriends have deemed our home the LOVESHACK!!! Bahahahaha! This got me thinking though...am I using my hubby to fill a GIGANTIC space in my heart/life? Am I putting too much on him and others? He can't calm my upset heart all the time, poor fella sometimes he's the source of my frustration!!! (I MEAN REALLY PUT THE TOILET SEAT DOWN!!! WILL A PEDICURE REALLY BUST THE BUDGET?? Hee hee!) My sweet besties, try as they might, can't fill my needy-want-approval-heart-at-all-times. Shopping sure can't fill it, chocolate can't (although this one gets really close, until the jeans are tight, heavy sigh), unrealistic romance movies can't fill my heart, and wanting a baby can't fill it.

Oh boy, did my answer come in an abrupt slap in the face moment last Sunday. I just happened to pop-in my Beth Moore DVD "A Heart like HIS" to hear her next lesson. She asked all of us Drama Queens out there if we let irritation or ANYTHING creep in and bleed out into everything else, before we ever turned to God. Do I have to answer that out loud? In my weekend of alone time, I let myself get so worked up. I didn't turn to Him. Him who offers me the best peace, love, and comfort in the world.  Some of us, um you know 'that girl'... ME, keep needing to hear messages like this and unfortunately must experience it in a furry of loneliness and years of heartache in trying to grow a family. God is and has been with me the whole time.

Have any of ya'll been there? Are you there today? Seeking, searching, waiting, hoping for something greater? Keep believing and looking for God's love all around you! You will be SHOCKED at the little things that mean so much. An encouraging note when you didn't expect it, a Hershey's kiss in your mailbox at work, seeing a recommitted heart in your friend after a battle with addiction, laughter in the wee hours with 4 best friends, an email from a friend who shares the same struggle you are going through, hearing God's voice streaming right into your ear from a DVD study, and praying with a husband that wants God more than anything else in this world. Be encouraged. Keep working out whatever thing HE is trying to teach you. Love you all for reading, praying, and following our story. More news to come!

24 hours!!

You never know what can happen in 24 hours. It seems like such a short amount of time, but then your day begins and you hit the ground running. Friday I received a message about a young darling girl, who we will call "Sarah". Sarah has a precious baby and is wanting to give this child up for adoption. I didn't know Sarah at all. My friends were at a bible study and just suggested that I call because after a prayer request for helping find this sweet angel baby a forever family...she thought of Michael and I.  Long story short, I spoke with Sarah and she had already found a family for her baby. Let me just tell you the HOPE that swelled in my heart though!!! The call for adoption EXPLODED to an all time high!!!! I've never seen a school building filled with so much hope and anticipation of what "might" happen. These ladies were an army of hugs, giggles, support, tears, but most of all HOPE. I'm SO grateful for my friends and family at work.

Well that's how our weekend started. We had several engagements, appointments and errands. Last Friday evening we were so blessed to be invited to a banquet to raise funds for thezoefoundation.com. Talk about a tearful, wonderful, BLESSING to attend such an event. The stories of how God brought little children into these couples lives were incredible. The spirit of adoption was contagious. We felt another reaffirmation for the path we are taking. Saturday morning we woke up ready to do our taxes, well as ready as one can be. After talking with our CPA and getting guidance on how to proceed with our fundraiser, we just felt a peace. SERIOUSLY, I can not say it enough...GOD IS GOOD!! He has led us through all the steps to bring us to this place.  After the tax man, off to the bank we went to create our adoption account. DID YOU HEAR THAT?? The t-shirt fever has caught on and we made our first deposit. Again, tears and giggles as I shared with our adorable bank officer the excitement and anticipation of what is to come. She even wanted me to email her our link for ordering shirts, so that all the girls at the bank could get one. TOO cute!!!! After the bank chit chatting, we headed to our dear friends Holly and Paul's Casa to celebrate Michael's Birthday.  Last Tuesday was my hunka hunka burnin love's birthday and what a better way to celebrate than with our besties!!! He does love a Krispy Kreme Donut! LOL! After the birthday festivities, we ended the day playing cards with the "Fab 4". Can I just say how BLESSED we are to have this close circle of friends??!!! Later on today I get to spend the afternoon with Whitney and Chelsea while they are taking pics of Miss Addison! Did I forget to mention she's only 9 days old!! Spank your bottom cuteness! Life is so FULL of joy!!! 

Tomorrow I have the privilege of placing my first t-shirt order with Ms. Sherri. I can't wait to see the look on her face when she sees the final count. Remember it's not too late to order your shirt, they are only $15. The shirts should be ready in 2 weeks. Thank you everyone for sharing our blog with your friends and family. The prayers and love are felt by all of you. Have a blessed Sunday!

Peace, Love, Adoption!!

Well it's time to update y'all on what's going on in our adoption journey. We are so excited to share the good news about our first fundraiser. Yup, we've decided to bite the bullet and ask for help. My dear friend Sherri offered to help us by sharing her amazing t-shirt making mad skills! LOL!  All I had to do was come up with a design. Sooooo here is my creation! Peace, Love, Adoption and my fave part in the heart "Hand Picked Heaven Sent"!!!!! LOVE, LOVE, LOVE it!!!!! You can choose between a fuchsia pink tee or turquoise tee, both will be printed on short sleeved tees.  I'll be taking orders through March 23, 2012. Now if this catches on with a larger enthusiasm than I expected, I'll try to get more shirts printed later in April. I'm lacking the computer savvy skills required to set up a PayPal/purchasing link on my page, so for now just post a comment on here if you'd like to order one and I'll give you a call or email you. We can work out the details together. I emailed our darling liaison, Angie, at Christian Homes of Abilene to see how the process is going and what we needed to do. She said "Your references are coming in wonderfully. Everything looks great!"  That made me feel good about where were at right now. A lot of people have been asking me "What's the timeline?" "Why Christian Homes?" So I thought it would be interesting to share the amazing website that gives a lot of information about the adoption timeline through Christian Homes of Abilene, it's www.christianhomes.com. So many dear friends have adopted through CHA and have precious "God Designed Families" that can only be explained because of God's timing and plan.  We just felt led to go through this agency and pray that God's will for building our family will come to fruition. Thanks for reading, continuing to pray, and loving us through this process. Oh and I have to give a shout out to my darling friend Sherri, y'all go on over to her facebook page and friend her, it's called "Stitches By Sherri".  She's the bomb!

Learning a little patience...

My first entry, that I typed so eloquently tonight, vanished after my computer cord came unplugged. Ahh, yes, there's that lesson in patience. So what began as a fast paced sprint to a finish line, has become a marathon. We eagerly completed our pre-application with Christian Homes of Abilene Agency. They actively seek to find "forever families" for sweet little babies. These brave birth moms give the choice of life. LIFE!! I'm forever grateful that my biological grandmother chose life for her daughter, my mom. I'm so very blessed that she placed her daughter up for adoption, so that my mom could grow up in a Christian home that was full of love and laughter. That was a sacrifice of love.

So back to the subject of patience. I'm learning that saving a large amount of money requires patience. What bliss and joy we were feeling prior to the opening of the fees for adoption letter. (This would be the part of the movie where the director cues the music DUNH, DUNH, DUNH and horrific screams would be heard!!) So our journey that we've wanted so desperately to SPEED up has slowed down to a crawl. We are needing to save $4,000 to take our next step in the application process. This is for home study fees, our first series of legal fees, application fees, orientation fees, etc... It takes a lot of people to run a fabulous facility that truly keeps the birthmother's and child's best interests at heart. WOW-WI-WOW this doesn't even include the 14% of our gross income for the final match placement fee.  So I'm learning patience, contentment in waiting, and seeking God's peace throughout this. "His grace is sufficient" is hard to remember when you're facing your next brick wall. That's when I had to repent, because in our excitement of telling so many of our friends and asking prayers for this decision, I've not been talking to God about it as much as I've told others. I will spend 30 minutes, OKAY let's get real people 3 HOURS working on a blog page that will captivate, capture, and tell our story, but not spend 10 minutes on my knees crying out to God. My sweet friend, Jen, comforted me through a struggle last week, she said  "I pray that God helps you today. Just today. We will deal with tomorrow then, but for the next 24 hours let's remember that we are not perfect, only He is, and if we fail, IT'S OK! It's just a reminder of how much we need Him and each other. So, let's take on today with much strength and zeal." So today I seek to find patience, peace, strength, love, and zeal in God's love!   Here's a precious song that melts my heart. We are all adopted!

So as my fingers type the last of this entry I want to remember no matter what the outcome of this journey, God's grace is sufficient and in Him alone will I find true peace and happiness. Oh and a small "sidedish" of patience. Hee hee! Thanks for reading, praying, and loving us through this. Love ya!

Our quest for babies...

Yes, we are sooooo dorky, but we have fun!!!! Well 13 years ago on June 19, 1999 I married the love of my life, Michael. We have known each other since the 4th grade, but life takes you to unexpected places. He went to into the military and got married and I went off to college. After a broken marriage, God brought Michael and his daughter Tiffany into my life. We knew it was God's plan for us to be together. God was ready to show us a life of his holiness, his hope, his patience, his love, true laughter, blessing, and endurance. In 2001, we knew we wanted to build our family, so we ventured down the road of fertility treatments, not knowing exactly what all that would entail. It was our first IUI cycle, so of course I went to Motherhood Maternity and bought my first maternity top before we even knew any results because I just knew that this was going to work! Hee hee! Then after a grave disappointment we realized that this was going to take a few more tries. Three attempts and five grueling years later we decided to wait. We were told to seek out IVF or look into adoption, both seemed so impossible, so yet again we waited. In 2009, we decided to try an IVF cycle. Now this was a big investment, but we were fortunate to be a part of a study group and received a substantial discount. For what unseeming reason I lost my three embryos. I know God has a special place in his heart for all the heartache and loss of babies. Yet through it all I still had this tug, longing, desire, to have a bigger family. Our church started a new ministry that focused on adoption by helping a local maternity home be rebuilt, renewed, and new moms feel loved. So the idea of adoption went from the back of my mind to the forefront again. We began filling out paperwork, seeking agencies, looking up all kinds of amazing adoption stories...that's when it became so clear. God wants to build our family through adoption. He wants to show how much he loves his little children. So here's our story. We're fumbling through paperwork, praying for a child, praying for that child's mother, praying for what seems so distant to become near if it's God's will. Thanks for reading my very first post! Stay tuned!